Queen West
for Ashlee Chatten
As I walk down queen west with my dad for the third time
in twenty-two years,
_______________I wonder if I will see you.
The white sky is cracked only by the ruddy buildings; &
____shiny new advertisements try to compel me with their
pink gums, white teeth.
______I walk ahead of my dad. I am ashamed
____that he is my dad.
We fight,
_the winter chill straining my
dad's bad heart. He threatens an immediate heart attack
______so I will slow down.
The young girls brush past holding bags of fashion,
____and the boys cling to them—
hips & chest.
I wonder if I will see you walking in the crowd
___with your mother.
__________But the faces I see are dolls;
they do nothing to comfort me. So I pray
because there is nothing else to do:
____________God, please tell me you were joking
when you said there is no way to get to you
___except to believe, because it is easier just to do things
than to have faith that
_____you'll do them for me.
As I walk down queen west with my dad for the third time
in twenty-two years,
_______________I wonder if I will see you.
The white sky is cracked only by the ruddy buildings; &
____shiny new advertisements try to compel me with their
pink gums, white teeth.
______I walk ahead of my dad. I am ashamed
____that he is my dad.
We fight,
_the winter chill straining my
dad's bad heart. He threatens an immediate heart attack
______so I will slow down.
The young girls brush past holding bags of fashion,
____and the boys cling to them—
hips & chest.
I wonder if I will see you walking in the crowd
___with your mother.
__________But the faces I see are dolls;
they do nothing to comfort me. So I pray
because there is nothing else to do:
____________God, please tell me you were joking
when you said there is no way to get to you
___except to believe, because it is easier just to do things
than to have faith that
_____you'll do them for me.
posted by shine.is.dead at 1:03 AM
4 Comments:
shit this is beautiful noah, and horrid and raw and intimate I dont know what else.
I really do love your poetry more and more as time goes on and your style develops, and even more so as I read more and more poetry and start to figure out what's good, and bad and brilliant in yours. I love it. Thanks noah.
like I said, this is the most intimate, explicit poem by you I've ever read. Thanks for being brave.
the best thing you have written that i have read
I still can't believe you wrote a poem for me. something that expresses you so deeply, and expresses me so deeply at the same time. You inspire me to be a better writer, but more than that to be a better person.
Thanks
Ash
P.S. It still makes me cry
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